My Second Hometown

I went to Sendai in Miyagi pre. on 26, 27 in this month. I was rly looking forward to going there since 'bout 2 or 3 weeks ago :-) I met my gud friends who were my classmates in a cram skool ; Kawai-juku bunnri 2 years ago :-D

After I graduated my HS, I'd been in the cram skool to study for entrance exams of a university for 1 year. I've lived a dorm: kori-nu Kitayama with 'bout 60 girls. It was the first time for me to live far from my family so long. I made a lot of gud friends at that time. We had same aim even though our universities which we wanted to go were different. The dorm life was not so easy. The rules are rly severe, such as "We have to come back dorm by 8 o'clock pm", "We must not enter anyone room anytime.",etc etc... If we would break those rules, a Dormitory superintendent came to scold us :P It was rly scary lol Of course, we had so many problems among friends in the dorm almost everyday X-O But everything in that days was very very GR8 experience for me.We talked a lot everyday and shared our dreams.

The friends whom I met in Sendai this time was not in my dorm. But we'd met in skool almost everyday. Our class name was J2 which was for students who will take National or Public universities. We'd taken almost same classes and studied together. We'd encouraged each other :-D I can clrealy remember those days although 2 years passed already. The 1 year and friends are my treasure. Whenever I remember that year, I can be strong and positive. The 1 year made me more deep person. That year changed me a lot. Sendai is my improtant memorial place for me. It is my second hometown.

Well, in Sendai, We talked a lot. I still have many things that I wanna talk with them yet, haha!! We went to many stores such as "Forus", "AER", "Sakurano",and so on<3

They will come to Akita pre to meet me coz I'm gonna live by myself in an apartment .They are living with their families now. So, if they came to my home indeed, they don't have to care about time to go back home after parties!! How nice it is, ha? Anyway, I rly looking forward to their coming!! I can't wait :-D Soon, I will go back to Akita pre. New life is gonna be started!!!! Spring is coming so soon. I know I will have many problems in my future. Yet, whenever I think 'bout my second hometown and days in there, I feel I can overcome any problems.

Thx Nozomi, Tomoko, Yuki, and Akiko(Next time, we absolutely meet,k??). I luv U guys very much :-) Let's keen'n touch, dear. We are GR8 friends 4ever!!!!!

Happy :-D ?? Unhappy ;-( ??

I have two bombs in my body. I mean I have irremediable diseases in my body now.
One is a really awful headache spell. and the other one is AVPR (actually, as for this, I am not sure if this is its exact name....) this is an eye disease.

I am not strong physically by nature.I often have had sickness.

I remember I already had a bad headache spell when I were very little. I went to a lot of hospitals, maybe about 8 or 9. Yet, every doctor said I might have a migraine. I have some medicines which is new,very expensive, special migraine medicine. But it isn't effective for me.
Doctors incline their heads as on man, and say "hmm...Why??"

Last year, at the end of November I had a terrible headache spell in my dorm again and was taken to the red cross hospital in Akita prefecture by an ambulance.
I already wrote about it on this blog. Check this article. "Thursday, November 30, 2006 Ambulance" Then you can know some details.

As for my eye disease, I am not sure what it is yet. And neither do Doctors.
I had a surgery in January24 because, in order to the disease I had a detachment of retina in my right eye. It was an emergency surgery and hospitalization. I had been in the Yamagata University hospital about for 2 weeks. It was really really painful!!! What is worse, I still have a possibility of another surgery and my left eye is also dangerous.

So I wasn't able to attend to any classes during winter program.I started from EAP(English Academic for purposes) level 1 last year. There is no skip system in EAP. I haven't finish EAP level 3 yet. I have to do it with new students from this spring. I cannot move on to BE(Basic education) with my love classmates ;-( That is really tough for me but I decided that I will do my best. The reason why I have such a disease is unknown. But I know it is not my fault lol

There are no ways to care these two diseases completely at this point, my doctor said. Many people think I am so unhappy or so poor. And They yearn for me.But I can feel happiness clearly now actually. At least I live now!! I can see the world now :-D I learned a lot of things which many healthy people cannot learn. I would not be able to learn them in my dairy life. It was precious time in my life. I noticed it is very very important for me to have GR8 friends. And now I have!!

No pain, No life.

I can't change the fact that I have diseases. But I can change my mind if I really want to!! I think there are no accidents in life. Only fatality is there.

I don't have time to be fall into a depression. I live now. This is the truth then, why don't I smile??Let's Lough Out Loudly with me!!!!Hahaha!! I will be more positive!!:-) Enjoy Our Life!!
You only get one life so live it to the fullest!!!

I feel I really really wanna help my friends and people with all of my strength. One of my friends who tell me very gr8 quotes said "It's easy to make someone happy but keeping them happy is a whole different story." I know. I know so I wish your happiness 4ever. So,

May I help you for your happiness??

Gastroenteritis

I had been in my bed about for 5 days. That is because I had a very very bad Gastroenteritis!!!
X-O

HOW AWFUL IT WAS!!!!!!!! ;-(

I had very bad stomachache and headache,diarrhea, nausea,high fever,chill,,,,etc

I am not good yet now...but better :-)

(sigh=3) Oh god, Please don't tease me,ha?

I know I am very very happy person even though I have a weak bady and unhealthy.

Yet, It is so hard....;-(

Anyway, I am planning to go to Sendai on next week to see my friends who were in my cram skool<3 rah rah rah :-D

I hope I can get over such a terrible sickness ASAP!!!I am really really looking forward to going there:-)

FACE BOOK

Yesterday, I started to make "face book". I found a lot of AIU students on there.
I didn't know "Face Book" until one of my classmates, Yuko told me its existence. lol
I love that sight very much coz I can make photo albums on line, and I can show my pictures to my friends and share our comments. How neat it is!! :-)

Hey you guys, Why don't you make your face book?? It is really helpful to make a lot of friends all over the world. If you are interested in it, Try to go here :p

http://www.facebook.com/index.php?logged_out=ddbc45a7eb861e29f29c4702a5c57096

You can enjoy making it, I am sure!! :-D
If you made your one, Please let me know, k? and please add me<3

Ｄｏｒｍ

I left my dorm which I lived for one year in.
My parents and I worked very hard to move all of my stuff to a new apartment.
Too much stuff!!!! I got so tired :p

My new apartment is really clean and comfortable one.
The name of it is "Spring"
I think the name will suit my feeling from this April.

Yet, I still wondering how should I be...
How should I live...
I feel lil sad and very worry about new life.
I miss my dorm life. However, simultaneously, My feeling become very clear and calm.

What is this??

What is this??

Time has passed soooooo quickly. and still I am waiting for "time".
Everything exactly became PAST.
Time will sweep away my wavers :-)
I will be OK from this Spring. Everything will be done. and
Everything will be changed, Everything will be started.


VIRTURE IS JUST A PACE OF BETRAYAL.
WHY I CAN'T HAVE A DECENT ANSWER??
ONLY WORDS HURRY TOO MUCH TOWARD LOVE.
I CAN'T FORGIVE YET.
SO, I DIDN'T ESCAPE.

I get a ".[period]", and I desappear.Then I can protect.
I had been praying...for a long long time.

Kill me, absolutely.
Eliminate me, completely.
Demolish me, thoroughly.

Then I can take a first step toward the freedom.

The strory which I have kept writing in this chapter was not beautiful.
'Twas not good-shaped.
And it was really rough and sad. But I will not tear the pages.

Now , I just close this book of mine.
And I will open the chapter someday with full of true smile.

Good-by is meeting.
End is Start.

Well, what should I write down in the next chapter??

ITS SO LUCKY THAT I DIDNT DIE TODAY.

This recalls a saying from my old mathematics teacher.

He said everyone will either die or survive for every single day.

In the sense of probability, it means you have 50% for dying and other 50% for surviving. And since the day i was born, i lived around 7800 days. The probability of still being alive today is:

(50% X 50% X 50%......)7800 TIMES. =0.000000000000000000000000
000000000000000000000000000000000000
0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001

meaning that my survival of today is a miracle.

And ... of coz... Same for all of you. Enjoy everyday as a gift from god~~~

This is a comment from one of my good friends(he is like my brother lol). That is really nice story don't you think so?? So, I wrote it here.

"It's so lucky that I didn't die today." I think so too.

"My survival of today is a miracle."

Yea,I strongly agree with him. I appriciate to gods everyday.

In the past,I said to him,"I don't believe god."But now I think there are gods in the world.

"Today is the good day to die." means I live with all of my best everyday,so I will not regret if I would die today. My life is a miracle,indeed. And yours too.Everyone's too.

I have ever heard this: One life = 1/300000000 "Today is a very good day to die." Maybe it sounds very strange,but it is not negative. Someday,I want to be a person who can say this phrase everyday.

It means "If I die now, I won't regret anything." It is almost same as "It's so lucky that I didn't die today." Thx for your really good comment,哥哥.

God bless all of you.

Today Is The Good Day To Die

Today is the good day to die.
'Cause I live now,
I can smile now,
I can see a beautiful sky now.

Today is the good day to die.
'Cause I have dreams now,
I have my family now,
I have my friends now.

Today is the good day to die.
'Cause I can breathe now,
I know I am living now,
I know I will die someday.

Today is a very good day to die.
Because I have nothing
And I have everything,

'Coz I love you.

So, Today is a very good day to die.